I decided to talk to Alex…after she returned from the fireman’s apartment after their night o’ passionate – whatever the heck it was that they were doin’! So,that meant waiting till morn. “Oh,u won’t believe what we did last n…Whoa! Why’re u glaring at me like that? ” Alex asked,bewildered at my cold stare at breakfast. “I need u to apologize to Lavender.” I replied,still glaring at her. ” & to me! ” Norman interrupted. “Oh! Did I hurt ur little girlfriend’s feelings? Don’t worry. She’ll be back! U’ll see her stupid,interfering face in here soon!” she calmly assured. “U hurt her feelings an’ she’s never comin’ back unless u apologize! ” I accused. “& u cancelled my show on purpose….’coz u’re jealous! Yeah! That’s right! U’ve always been jealous…& completely rude! ” Norman seconded. “Cry-babies! Why d’you even care so much about her? There are plenty of prettier fish in the sea! ” she remarked. Alex was asking me to move on? She didn’t even know anything about relationships! That made me lose it! “No,there aren’t! Not for me anyway! I’m 40, damn it! I can’t stay single forever! Lavender was the only girl who didn’t care how old I was or how rude u were or what a loner Norman was! She actually put up with us, when every other girl I’ve ever been with in the past,just left! I was holding onto the nicest person & u drove her away!! ” I yelled. “Ok! I’ll apologize! Don’t throw a fit! ” she finally agreed. “It better be a heartfelt one! ” I muttered. “What about me?! ” Norman reminded her. “Relax. I’ll bang one of the producers, so ur show’s gonna be safe, ‘kay? ” she promised,before hurrying out the door to apologize to Lavender, who hopefully would accept her apology.
THE RUDE, THE SAD AND THE LAZY: Chapter 18